What’s “the spark”? It’s that feeling of butterflies in your stomach, the electricity that passes through you when you touch the one you love, that deep down excitement. Some believe it’s inevitable that this feeling will dim and eventually disappear. This is a myth. While it’s normal to lose the spark in a relationship when you get comfortable, you can always get it back. And there are steps you can take now to avoid losing the spark at all.


Learning how to keep the spark alive is possible. It takes more than just scheduling a date or two to make real, lasting change in a relationship. When both you and your partner are committed to reigniting the spark in a relationship, you’ll find that anything is possible.


You must create what you desire rather than hoping for it to happen or relying on your partner to do the job. To be a good partner, you must be emotionally fit and capable of shifting from desiring to doing. Consider the beginning of your relationship: you were willing to go to any length to make that person happy. What are you prepared to do now? You cannot expect something to change without your participation.


When was the last time you had a meaningful conversation with your partner? Communication is essential for keeping the spark alive. Talking does not imply having a quick conversation before falling asleep. It involves creating future plans, understanding your partner’s love language, and learning what the other is thinking. It entails having a genuine, emotional connection with your loved one and perceiving things from their perspective.

According to research, you need five times as many positive communications as negative ones to have a good connection, especially if you want an intimate one. It’s easy to understand the harmful consequence of people feeling shut out and excluded from their intimate partner’s domain. If you want to know how to bring the spark back into a relationship, you must prioritize strong communication.


What we’re attracted to in others is oftentimes another part of ourselves that we’re not activating. Then, we get resentful because those qualities are being shut down and stifled in the other person as communication deteriorates, which comes through as frustration with the relationship. 

Relationships can grow stale when routine and habit set in – and growth is the key to how to keep a relationship alive. Vow to learn something new together, take a vacation to somewhere neither of you have ever been or find an activity you can experience together. To grow together instead of growing apart, you have to be willing to stretch yourselves both individually and as a couple.


It may seem incompatible, but planning for surprise can make a significant difference for partners, particularly when it comes to how to keep the spark alive. Planning a surprise date is an excellent way to get out of a rut and show your lover you care. Put some time on your partner’s schedule but don’t tell your partner what you’ll be doing.

Then spend quality time doing something you both enjoy, whether that’s going for a beverage or dinner, seeing a show, taking a walk, going on a weekend getaway or even something like getting popcorn and drinks for a fun movie night at home. Your partner will see that you care enough to make time for them and you’ll remember the reasons that you got into this relationship in the first place.


When a relationship loses its spark due to something such as infidelity, or when trust is lost for another cause, each partner must make a conscious decision to move ahead. This entails sincerely forgiving them and letting go of any previous disappointments. The only thing that is true is this moment, and accepting forgiveness for all those who have harmed you in the past – especially your partner – is the only way to genuinely live our present.


In a relationship, give and take refers to the balance of giving and receiving between two people. It involves both partners making an effort to contribute to the relationship in various ways, such as emotional support, time, attention, and resources. Give and take is important for maintaining a healthy and fulfilling relationship, as it helps to build trust, respect, and mutual understanding. When both partners are willing to give and take equally, it can create a strong foundation for a lasting and meaningful relationship.